1st Journal Entry In Wyoming

As mindlessness takes hold
I contemplate eternity
and my mind becomes enveloped
in a conversation with the roots
from which I've grown.

My expanding concept of Now
mingles with my already infinite Then.
They don't get along.

Even here, where Earth's history
takes deep root, there is such a
sense of survival based on
popularity. And I stand alone
in wanting to learn my Earth's
mysteries, it's secrets that come
with peace of mind, not with having
to prove myself even more worthy
with inane tests.

I have been pushed my
entire life. I have figured
out riddles that few dare
even to be asked, in fear they get
lost. But, they don't realize that
they were born lost, deep in
the cosmos, into an island
that is not charted in even
the most in depth galactic maps.
We call it Earth.

The human heart, solely, is a compass
that will always point in the direction
of home, whichever form home will
take, in an infinite yet lost world.
The human brain, appears to be our
ability to interpret the coordinates
in which our hearts are ever-striving to reach.

The sad truth is that the
newly growing hearts that are
the youth, are losing their ability
to find home, as their compasses
are being doused with cyanide.

All the while, their brains cannot
send their hearts in the right direction,
(due to the masters of illusive happiness,
who provide a false sense of being home)
because in fact they are facing a rock wall
in a cave, left to ponder about shadow puppets
that move around on a reoccurring film strip.

And nobody will listen to my solution
as I scream it out loud.
TURN AROUND! Look at what they
have made you think is real. We need to
leave this mind trap of a cave,
and understand the island we've grown so attached to.

But it's impossible if all of your backs are turned.

The sky and ground have never been so close..

The thing about life m'dear,
is that the rules of infinity
were never too clear.

Love in the busy streets,
the messy beds,
the hungry stomachs,
and soda breads.

Consequence though,
is it always to be dragged out and lame?
is aftermath never cherished?

regardless of who called,
and who came.

Dazed shepherds we be,
finding saint-hood and solace inside of one another.
Yet the world turns and let's us basque in the everlasting now.

They turn that wrinkled page
that's already been read,
while we cling onto the words of God,
that appear in the first chapter,
and find love and understanding,
yet can't apply it to mankind's priorities.

Does that mean they are skewed?
are they crazy are they fucking nuts ?!

Am I crazy?
and fucking nuts?

At least m'dear,
the equinox has passed.
the ice bodies will melt,
and scream HAPPY BIRTHDAY !

And as melted snow fertilizes the spring soil,
the thawing veins and vessels of Man,
shall embrace the tree of One Infinite Mind,
and connect all people,
of past, present, and future time.